Dear Facebook Diary,
I believe that all women are whores. I hold to this belief because I have had a handful of one night stands with women and I know a few other guys that have had them too, and I’ve seen movies and TV shows where men have sex with women on the same day that they meet them. Therefore, I have come to the conclusion that all women on planet Earth are whores.
Oh wait, are you saying that it is childish of me to lump an entire group of people together based on a few personal experiences and assumptions? Oh Christ, and how gay it was of me to label something as being retarded because it is my duty to make sure that nobody ever has their feelings hurt because I used a word they disagree with. Dammit! I probably pissed off a Christian by using the word Christ and I bet there’s a member of the lGBTQIASOFMPOMUBL community that could be extremely offended by my use of the word gay in a negative sense!
Well anyways, I just watched a pro-feminism awareness video where a young attractive girl dressed up like a hooker, à la leather miniskirt and a tube top, walked through the shittiest part of a city where degenerates and other uneducated men yelled horrendous words at her like the word “beautiful” as she walked by, and then the video used this as there example of how rampant ‘cat calling’ is and how hurtful it is towards women and how all men must stop this extremely common act immediately. First of all, I have never ‘cat called’ a girl before and I don’t know any other guys that have and I’ve never even seen or heard it happen before either. I am an educated, straight, single, healthy white male in America and according to every reality TV watching, Facebooking, Tweeting , teenage mentality asshat I am naturally a racist, gay bashing, misogynist that has it easy in life. It’s easy for them to point me out as the enemy because I am supposedly part of the majority, and it is the majority that is holding down the hundreds of ever important #MINORITIES.
Let me tell you what is wrong with all of this. The problem is that it is now cool to be in a minority. It is now common thinking that you are not considered a person of significance unless you have been marginalized by another group of people and you are now trying to fight this wrongful act by marginalizing others. Breaking yourself and your make believe social media friends off into their own groups and giving it a hashtag does not constitute as a social movement or anything of significance. It is simply your own way of attention whoring. You are not changing peoples’ minds by wearing a “Gay Support” t-shirt or a “I Love Being a Fat Ass” bib while eating at McDonald’s, you are only doing it for your own sense of gratification of having a random person smile and give you the thumbs up, and then you feel reassured in your imaginary battle when someone looks offended by your fucking “movement”. If I wear a Swastika or a Pedobear shirt out in public there will be countless people that would get offended by it, but I’m willing to bet I would at least get one high five from some random white janitor, and all it would prove is that there are at least a few people that are thinking the same thing that I am. But either way I could bathe in the grace of being publicly noticed. Which is exactly what all of these fucking hashtagging fucktards are doing. They are creating their own make believe movements just for the sake of thinking that they actually have something to fight for and they can get attention without doing anything more than posting shit on Facebook or Youtube.
And the gay thing, I do agree that the suppression of gay rights is wrong and I do relate it to the way that black people were treated in the earlier 20th century in the states, but how many fucking letters do they have to add to their LGBT thing? The more letters and groups that they add to it the more ridiculous I think it is. Everyone wants to be that special minority that claims to know what it is like to be repressed because then they can bitch about how tough their life is, even though their difficult life is comprised of searching for negative comments that vaguely relate to their lifestyle on other websites. And guess what else, those people that are opposed to your lifestyle, well they are another minority of people that have created their own little group too.
And the “body love” bullshit where fat people say that they are proud of being fat even though they are insulted when somebody calls them fat, guess what? You are the majority! Over half of Americans are now overweight and your stupid fucking movement where you claim that it is easier for mankind to change their opinions of beauty rather than one single person changing their appearance for the sake of others’ sexual approval is now pointless. You won the battle of making the majority of people look and act as you do, so now what are you going to cry about? I eat healthy and workout like a motherfucker and it is not my duty to make sure that there are chairs or planets to support your weight and I am not going to change what I am physically attracted to because you think you should be a part of that group.
I’m going to create a movement where I only wear sweatpants and am allowed to shit my sweatpants and walk around with stinky pants full of poop, and anyone that is offended by it is simple minded and hateful. My saggy sweatpants will be so weighed down with poop that my dick-neck will be visible above the waistline of the pants, and then I will start a movement where I am deeply offended by the amount of people that stare at my dick-neck while I am speaking instead of looking me in the eyes. And all of this will prove that people are idiots that need to be more open minded about people that shit their sweatpants and show off their dick-necks because Christ alive that is a battle worth fighting for. And you can bet my poopy ass that I will be on the constant lookout for anyone that looks at or talks to me in any way that I might find offensive because I am tired of being repressed!